Wheaton Montessori School
Creating Family Rituals
Rebecca Lingo • Dec 27, 2023

During this time of togetherness, we have an opportunity to create family and holiday rituals with our children. In his book, Ritual: How Seemingly Senseless Acts Make Life Worth Living, anthropologist Dimitris Xygalatas explains how rituals provide balm for our anxieties, encourage our connections with each other, and help us find meaning in our lives.


Our children depend upon rituals, too. In fact, rituals provide our family members with an awareness of family identity and positive experiences that help them cope with stress. When we have special memories in our lives, we can draw upon the connective times and rely upon an internal sense of having a web of support rather than feeling alone. 


Rituals also help our children develop a growing sense of themselves as a member of a greater whole which promotes positive developmental outcomes. Plus, traditions are fun!


In this blog, we thought we would share a few ideas of customs and practices. 


Craft (or Re-Craft) Cards Together


Repurposing holiday cards is a fun way to go back through the greetings your family received and extend the spirit of the season. Children can cut out pictures from the cards, or even cut off the half without writing. These pieces can be pasted onto a blank piece of paper or card stock to create a collage or new card. The half-cards can also be used as post-cards with a brief note or thank you jotted on the undecorated site. 


This low-cost activity not only offers children a way to creatively express themselves, but it also can provide practice with several fine motor skills. If your child is not yet writing, they can dictate their message. Children can learn how to make a homemade envelope and even practice writing the mailing and return address. 


If your children are really enjoying this process, they can also send homemade greetings to the nonprofit Cards for Hospitalized Kids for distribution (just be sure to check the site for guidelines, especially regarding glitter!).


Sing Together


Music is a powerful way to cultivate togetherness and belonging. When we sing (and dance!) together we build trust and empathy, while also alleviating stress. The holidays offer so many opportunities for creating music. If you aren’t keen on traditional carols or songs of the season, another fun option is to gather different music-making tools, like different-sized bells or even glasses with different amounts of water in them. Experiment with gently shaking the bells or tapping glasses with a pen or similar item to create a little melody. If everyone likes the tune, play around with adding some words to describe a funny part of the day, tell a story of the holiday, or share about a favorite food! Does your family have a favorite playlist? Now is a great time to create a list of songs to listen to with each other. Ask Kelly and Lauren, our adolescent teachers, about their playlists and about the students’ reactions to singing Over the River and Through the Woods annually!


Cook & Bake Together


Time in the kitchen is always a wonderful way to create special memories. With extra time during days off, you can revel in the experience of gathering ingredients, measuring, mixing, decorating, and even getting sudsy during the clean-up.


Young children might enjoy dipping pretzels, fruit, or peppermint sticks in melted chocolate and then (before the chocolate hardens) twirling them in sprinkles. Or if you have a favorite cookie recipe for the holidays, your children can help make a batch and then package the cookies with a fancy bow to deliver to neighbors or to those working over holidays (like firefighters, hospital staff, and service industries). 


Listen to or Share Stories Together


Storytelling captures our imaginations and transports us to other times and places. We create special moments when we come together and share stories, memories of past years or stories from our own childhoods. Invite children to share their stories, too! This kind of story time could be an opportunity to read treasured picture books aloud. Even older children will delight in the opportunity to revisit old favorites. 


We can also create a scene like that of the days when families would gather to listen to a radio drama. Make it cozy and special with pillows, soft blankets, and special snacks. Read aloud or listen to an audio story. Every library has free apps for audio books and an audio book section to borrow through. Sites like Story Nory or Light Up Your Brain offer short pieces (roughly 5 to 10 minutes long) if you want to warm up to the story-listening experience! 


Pro-tip: Did you know that children with ADHD tend to love audiobooks? Read https://www.wheatonmontessori.org/listening-is-reading-too for our endorsement of listening to books.


Become a Tourist in Your Town


Tour holiday lights. Have everyone get into pajamas, take a thermos or to-go cups of hot chocolate, and take a neighborhood driving tour with plenty of stops for sipping cocoa. For some added fun, you can rate favorite front-yard displays, create a scavenger hunt, or try to fill out homemade bingo cards. Play holiday music also helps set the mood. Pro-tip: You can do this for Halloween decorations too! St. Charles Park District publishes a map annually.




Rituals are a significant part of our human experience and offer us ways to ground ourselves and form connections. Let’s use these days together to connect with our family and create new memories. Please share your favorite rituals with us in pictures or comments. We love to hear from you!


Why Do Our Children Do What They Do?
By Rebecca Lingo 25 Mar, 2024
Kids have innate tendencies like exploration, curiosity, and order. This is emphasized in the Montessori approach.
Six Steps to Problem Solving
By Rebecca Lingo 18 Mar, 2024
The process for addressing challenging behavior in children through collaborative problem-solving, intending to foster cooperation and resolve issues.
Share by: